Saturday, January 15, 2011

Book Review - Never Be Lonely Again

About the Book 
In our fast-paced world of longer working hours and quick distractions, it's difficult to develop and maintain relationships that soothe the soul.  Even as relationship and behavioral experts, both Pat Love and Jon Carlson found themselves battling the plague of loneliness.  It was only after a momentous meeting with the Dalai Lama that Love and Carlson began to develop an effective approach that would recalibrate the way they understood relationships. Now with Never Be Lonely Again (HCI Books), readers will learn how to find the necessary time to maintain friendships, be truly present for a partner, and reach out to people when in need.  Pat Love and Jon Carlson tackle the problem of loneliness head on, showing how to develop healthier, more emotionally satisfying behaviors that will nurture the relationships they have, and make them more open to lasting personal connections.

Never Be Lonely Again explains why loneliness is such a common problem in our fast-paced world; combines social science, Buddhist spirituality, and common-sense advice in an accessible and universal approach; provides a clear, practical guide for connecting conversation; and highlights the importance of meaningful work and how it can alleviate loneliness.


Other than breathing, we spend more time taking in stimulation from technology than any other activity; few moments are spent in quiet reverie let alone contemplation.  There are five questions* however, which are well worth your time and attention to ponder, as they can literally change the course of your life.  Never Be Lonely Again teaches readers how to ask these questions of themselves and find meaning in the answers.

Five Questions* from Pat Love and Jon Carlson (2011) Never Be Lonely Again: The Way Out of Emptiness, Isolation, and a Life Unfulfilled


1.  Who am I?  

Your core values reflect who you are.  Think about how you want the people you love to remember you, and then live each day demonstrating these characteristics and your life will take on a new direction and energy.

2.  Am I connected?
You need three to five people in your close circle of contact—people who know you and pay close attention to you; in whom you can and do confide. If you improve the quality of your connections, comfort and contentment will greatly increase.
 

3.  Am I living in community?
Invest in people outside your close circle of friends/family and you feel a true sense of well-being and belonging.
 

4.  Are my talents being utilized in meaningful work?
Work doesn’t have to be the activity for which you get paid. Talents are something you enjoy doing—when you use them to benefit others you feel productive and useful, like you are earning your keep here on earth.
 

5.  Am I living out the purpose of my life?  
Chances are, if you concentrate on the other four questions you will answer yes to this question but it bears asking. Am I doing what I was put here on earth to do?  What could I do that would make the answer to this question yes? Do it and your life will improve in every possible way.

ABOUT THE AUTHORS
 Dr. Pat Love is a distinguished professor, author, trainer, and long-standing licensed clinician.  For thirty years, she has contributed to counselor education and personal development through her books, articles, training programs, speaking and media appearances.  Her ever-popular books include Hot Monogamy and The Truth About Love.  Her latest book, How to Improve Your Relationship Without Talking About It, has been translated into 12 languages.  Dr. Love has appeared numerous times on Oprah, The Today Show, and CNN, and is a regular contributor to popular magazines, including Psychology Today.  Love has co-hosted three DVD training programs: Living Love, Parenting with the Experts, and Love: Everything You Need to Know—which is currently available on PBS.  Visit the author's website www.patlove.com.
 

Jon Carlson is distinguished professor of psychology and counseling at Governors State University and a psychologist at the Wellness Clinic in Lake Geneva, Wisconsin.  He has authored 50 books including Time for a Better Marriage, Adlerian Therapy, Inclusive Cultural Empathy, The Mummy at the Dining Room Table, Bad Therapy, The Client Who Changed Me, Their Finest Hour, Creative Breakthroughs in Therapy, and Moved by the Spirit.  He has created over 250 professional trade video and DVDs with leading professional therapists and educators.  In 2004 the American Counseling Association named him a "Living Legend."  In 2009 the Division of Psychotherapy of the American Psychological Association named him "Distinguished Psychologist" for his life contribution to psychotherapy.  Recently he syndicated an advice cartoon "On The Edge" with cartoonist Joe Martin.

My Take on the Book
This book is a must have resource for anyone that is or has gone through a time of loneliness in their life. Whether this is from leaving a relationship, losing a loved one or other reason this book does a great job at helping you understand what loneliness is and what you can do to move beyond it.

The book is very practical and easy to understand. It takes you first through the process of understanding what loneliness is and what it can do to a person and then leads you step-by-step on a path toward moving forward with your life into one that is much brighter and better than one filled with loneliness.

I see this book as a great resource and it is one that I would have no qualms with sharing with others that are going through tough times, as I do believe that it will help get someone back on their feet and moving forward with their life!

All opinions expressed in this review are my own and not influenced in any way by the company.  Any product claim, statistic, quote or other representation about a product or service should be verified with the manufacturer or provider. Please refer to this site's Disclaimer  for more information. I have been compensated or given a product free of charge, but that does not impact my views or opinions. 
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